Pamela Geller:  Shrieking Harpy Rant Generator

by Sheila Musaji

I wish I had found this gem sooner.  Charles Johnson at Little Green Footballs has provided a service for those who just can’t get enough of Pamela Geller’s particular form of “love” for and “truth telling” about Islam and Muslims.  He calls it the Pamela Geller:  Shrieking Harpy rant generator and introduces this time-saving Pamela Geller rant generator thusly:

A few days ago we linked to an LGF reader’s funny Pamela Geller Blog Generator. Well, the Geller parody is such a rich mine of comedic material that I couldn’t resist creating my own version. So without further ado, here’s the new LGF Shrieking Harpy Rant Generator, featuring automatic rants created with quotes from the Harpy herself and some of her ugly Photoshop illustrations. I tried to get the patented Geller mix of random capitalization, bright red words, sloppy typos, and egregious overuse of punctuation, although I did have to tone down the bigotry and hate speech a little (because it interfered with the funny).

We all know that Pamela Geller, aka The Shrieking Harpy, is a one-woman factory of mind-melting bad craziness, but there are only so many hours in a day when she’s sober enough to type.

Now you no longer have to wait to get your fix of her patented blend of illiteracy, spite, and venomous xenophobia; with LGF’s Shrieking Harpy Rant Generator, you can instantly enjoy a hateful, incoherent Gelleresque diatribe any time of the day or night!

Just hit the big obvious button below, and in no time you’ll have a vitriolic word salad indistinguishable from the work of the real Harpy herself!

(A Mad King Chuckie Production. Inspired by The Pamela Geller Blog Generator.)

After hitting the “big obvious button” a few times, and laughing at how much the rants produced resemble actual “articles” by Geller, I clicked on the link at Fenris Designs that had inspired Johnson’s effort.  Here is the introduction to the Pamela Geller Blog Generator:

Can’t get enough Pamela Geller? A lot of us can’t. Yes, many of us love her incoherent and often quite sloppily spellchecked rants on the Atlas Shrugs blog, and she’s gracious enough to provide us with at least one bout of xenophobia and Godwin’s Law a day. Alas, she is just one person, and can only express so much teeth-cracking hatred toward Muslims, liberals, and cable television for so long before she has to rest and recuperate.

That’s where this Pamela Geller Blog Generator comes in! Now you too can weave your own conspiracy theories, your own plots to take over America, tailoring Geller’s own phobias to your needs! The possibilities are endless!

Well, okay, there’s only 15,625 different combinations, but you know what I mean. Anyway, to get started, select your choices below…

Both of these are worth checking out, and more fun than the “real” Geller posts.  I only wish that some computer whiz out there would come up with a more interactive version of this - where you could make more choices, for example, and then print out your results - possibly as humorous birthday cards for your Muslim friends.